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Penniesim that kid that you see as naive
you don't need me
but you want me to be
there for you if you want to
and what do i get
and you don't even sweat
on the big things the stories
i'm raging and roaring
you're whoring yourself out again
and its boring
i'm boring a hole to the life you uphold
got a role
so i'll play it but this game i'm saying
i don't need your silence
one more reason i'm writing
show me a feeling
or i'm right
not gonna roll
its a no go
i got a feeling you'll give up
not gonna get with this get up
show me you're reeling
you're not though
gimme a story
or show me.
i'm that girl that you found intriguing
truth is i don't think you can perceive me
not even sure that you even see me
but one of us lies and its easy
get up and get go
i got no pull here to stay
so i let go
rush me i'm pushing away
but i'm back though
i don't even know
soul to soul or im solely alone
YoursI'm okay for now and I'm standing tall
but in a second I'm backed up against the wall
in my head my back arches
but my head just falls
and my shoulders drop
and my thoughts hit the floor/
you glance across the room and my mouth creases up
in a way it gives away and you give me that look
the smile slips down and I'm on one foot
my fingernails click, I say I'm okay, but/
You know it's not true, you can see right through me
peel back a smile and my eyes look roomy
it's not quite a lie, but it's not quite true
we'll drop it for tonight and I'll call another truce/
I'm tired of the way you think I'm being obtuse
and the only thing I've got is 'it's me, it's not you'
in actuality it's everything I've ever been through
the reality's duality and one of me'll lose/
so call it off for a second and i'm feeling like water
slipped through your hands but i'm inside your pores
stuck to your skin and I'm feeling remorse
I can't save you from me more than I can be more/
than I am, than I should be
TeethSing me out a story
I don't need a reason just to rhyme
I got my paper A$ lined
that shit you're selling, I'm not buyin.
the only thing that's left of me
chew me up and spit me out
but either way I'll break your teeth-
RamblesBut then I think
this pen and ink
wants to write the
ins and outs of my mind
and then i find
the final line
why is it then
that I'm not fine?
I write about
falling and how
it's different for me than you
but the truth
it's not a hard line
and all in all
my life's quite fine
it isn't perfect,
but then I suspect,
a million people have it worse than I.
Every night I do it.
I chew on thoughts and bury words
squashing sentences at the bottom of the bright ideas pile
the light switch is on but every bulb's blown
I repeat and repeat and repeat
scrap replay, replay rethink, remember
it changes and I forget
and then it's never what it was so
the words evolve, adapt
getting chewed and mangled
and then I forget the point
and I sleep
or I dream
and the problem's solved til the night comes again.
It's quiet and im still
emptied but soft
I feel fleshy and light.
I can feel every ounce of me wiegh down as I float
and the memory of words
I can't move
and the past is immovable
but it's quiet
cotton soft quiet.
In the dark when I close my eyes
in floods light.
of my eyelids
im holding no pictures
no more now than i knew
can't solve and can't prove
but the light
and the quiet
the soft and the new
the good and the hope
these might carry me through.
PulseIt's bright and it's broken
it's flickering, rusted
the heart of a creature I couldn't have trusted
for fear or for hunger of minor disaster
a flesh that's quite warm yet it's lacking in lustre
a blister of truth
or a wrinkle of trust.
It's dark and it's dusty
quite damp, and encrusted
with scars and a venom that's destined to break it
and fuelled with a stream of casual acquaintances
mind that knows need but not how to relate
and i'm broken
I must hope
for a reason
a sign that it's right
lest we fall with the seasons,
and falling is reason enough.
pleased to meet you
shes a dancer
give a chance of
she'll destroy you
she'll destory you
catch an eye and
trace a line and
catch it wandering on
out and to the side
i don't know you
hasn't told you
she's a weapon
she's a snake and
she's a soldier
she'll unfold you and
she'll be cold and
feign a smoothness
all a tactical maneuver
hasn't told you all the moves and
old directory of truths and
turns it back and it's on you
it's paranoia paranoia
at a glance inside of who
not the one you thought you knew
maybe it was never you
things were different you'd lose
find a catalogue of proof
or a dialogue of use
the admission of
LanguishSick of my sickness with the language barrier
find a new character and my thoughts might carry her
stuck on the crest of my friccative wave
I need a new brain hole, and a new wave to save me/
sick of my sickness and I can't get rid
burn a hole in my head when I'm flicking eyelids
clicking my fingers and I'm blaming the timezones
ticking the clock off ignore the power that the hands hold/
sick of my apathy and of being on a downturn
pissing them off with the message that my frown earns
forgetting that faces have a language of their own
well versed and rehearsed there, I'm holding on, though/
Sick of my sickness with the braindead bitch
with the realisation I'm the one true hitch
remembering now that it's all down to tone
get the fuck off the keys and back into the zone.
It's sad but it's true that that's what I do.
You'd think that it's useful, clairvoyance
a truthful reminder of all that's to come,
I'll write in my diary so I can remind me of everything that could be done.
But therein's the problem you see:
the future, quite naturally,
is a definite thing, a condition of truth
and the only thing I've got is absolute proof
that the things that'll pass are just destined to happen,
to build and to ruin,
to break and to rescue,
so all I can do is to politely ask you to please, if you please-
should I take you to task- let me lead with a question and hear what i ask
that you might answer in full understanding of what we all know, and here all I'm demanding
is truth to placate me so I can let go
of a foreshadowing that'd passed long ago.
Lost without your LoveThe rain is tapping lightly
outside on the tender leaves.
I look through the windonw
on this cool summer night
caressed by a gently breeze.
I am missing you deeply inside
staring blankly, into space;
curtains blowing softly
against my skin
tears of love, run down my face...
Staring, for the longest while
never realizing the passing time.
Trying to find the pieces
to make it right
the words, to make it rhyme...
For how can I ever tell him
let the deepest part of me show?
That I'm lost without his love...
How will he ever know?
Compassion Of The Heart...Come over here and talk to me,
I told my little boy.
"Oh mom I'm mad, my brand new friend,
stole my only toy!"
"My dear sweet son, it pains me so,
to see you so upset, but there's one thing
you ought to know, one thing you won't forget."
"Please mother tell me, what it is
this thing I ought to mind? Can I buy it, is it new
or maybe does it wind?"
Ah my son it's nothing new, it's been around awhile
It's something that I always knew, that won't go out of style!
Son, it's nothing stores can sell, or put upon a shelf,
it's not a truck or Lego set, or some poor garden elf.
Son there's some that don't have much,
your friend and many more...but we will find another toy,
in another store!
It's sad of course your toy is gone, theft is never right...
but think of how your friend might feel, without a toy in sight.
Of course he may have borrowed it, cause friends they often do
I mean to say what is a friend? What does that mean to you
Holding onto YouLooking out through the window,
my thoughts, only I know...
Since the day I left you
it's been raining, constatly
for days in a row.
As I sit here watching
I quietly ask myself 'when'
will I begin to smile?
Will the sun start to shine again?
For love with you was beautiful
so beautiful....at one time.
You had a way with words
a way, of making them rhyme.
On and on, endlessly
your sweet voice filled the air;
making me feel the love you claimed
- though, it was never there.
Now here I sit remembering
sweet memories, of then...
Hating myself for loving you
and wanting you back again.
You WereYou were a moment of truth and beauty,
that once had touched my life.
You loved me, you really did;
now, I am paying the price.
Paying the price for ignoring the fact
you were so deeply involved;
as I selfishly left you alone with a problem
I knew only I could solve...
Now all that's left to my life is 'hope'
hoping and wondering,... if, and when?
Will those precious moments of truth and beauty
ever touch my life again.
Angel of SuicideAngel of darkness
angel of death.
I wear you tight to my knuckle
hold you close to my chest.
Black is your color
with a face I can't see.
I wait for your touch
to transform me...
Me into 'you'.
To die is to live.
Freedom in ebony
My song is a scream
my bed is a grave.
I sought peace and rest
but became I
...Now I can't go back
and my deepest of fears
flow quick from my eyes
transparent black tears.
'Hell', she runs deep...
Endless others like me
have sought an escape...
ReflectionsLike silent raindrops falling
reflections, shown in tears.
The agonies and sorrows;
a picture painted clear.
Each one tells a story
in, such a way
compassionately, as to make you feel
what words could never say.
Watch them slowly falling.
Listen, with your eyes;
to the pictures, painted before you.
See them come alive.
So very colorfully dancing;
in full detail
one, by one...
On and on,
you can't escape.
The story is never done.
Breathe Love Like AirBreath love like air, and live
Return from the darkness
Embrace all life as kin
And let peace touch your heart
The saccharine kiss of
Hope can make bitterness
Evolve on cynics' tongues
Leaving an aftertaste
Vanquished are the moments
Engulfed in innocence
Life does not let you live
In perfect happiness
Kisses of destiny
Either raze or nourish
A man's deepest beliefs
In pure honesty, I-
Repeat, breath love like air
When honesty EntersYou rubbed the dust from my wings
so I can not love you 'freely'.
Your ways are oppressive
of anger, and control;
'free', love has to be.
The death of an angel...
A broken rag doll.
I feel, I've fallen from grace.
For with hatred you have looked me
deep in the eyes,
while the hands I loved
slapped my face.
My fear, hides in the dark.
But against my will - 'honesty'
lights up the room
my broken heart.
I realize I've got to fly;
away with my feelings
to a bright place;
where love goes
heartsim crouched in my own little world
filled with fear
until your bright light shines and i can see clear
im here in my own little world
filled with hope
as you pull away and i struggle to cope
i sit in my own little world
that you arent who i first had known you to be
whilst i sit in my own little world
that the world has just left me far behind.
This is my own little world,
Torn apart - but the truth is - it only exists in my Heart...
Red Riding HoodI want to believe people so badly when they say they won’t bite
that I contemplate climbing into their smiling jaws
thinking that it might be better to be split in two than left hanging.
But always, I draw my red hood and flit back into the forest
running in the shadows of pathways, never stepping into clearings
because I’ve spent my whole life in the wilderness
and I still can’t tell the wolves from the woodsmen.
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